Nine months ago, I wrote about becoming an empty nester. Before this goes off the rails, “this is California, not Kentucky!” (bonus points if you get this reference…)
I’m talking about my first year without kids around in 23 years. Having the choice to sleep in on a weekend or go to brunch. Traveling without coordinating school calendars, sports seasons, or return flights around someone else’s obligations. Grocery shopping for more than Diet Coke and coffee cream. The structure is gone in ways I expected, and in a few I didn’t.
What I didn’t expect was how quickly identity gets wrapped up in routine.
For years, the calendar was full because it had to be. Practices, pickups, games, school events, dinner, laundry, repeat. Then one day, the noise quiets down and you’re left with a different question: Now what?
I see a version of that same moment play out every day in hiring.
For many professionals, this realization comes after years in the same company or role. You’ve been focused on the work itself, solving problems, leading teams, and delivering results, without stopping to ask whether the role still fits who you are today. Then change happens, by choice or not, and the question is suddenly right in front of you.
For hiring managers, the challenge is no different. As businesses grow and priorities change, roles evolve along with them. The qualities that defined success three years ago may not be what the position requires today. Yet many organizations continue recruiting based on outdated assumptions, from inflexible job requirements to workplace expectations that limit the talent pool. When companies hire for yesterday’s role instead of today’s needs, they risk missing the right candidates altogether.
Job seekers start chasing titles instead of alignment. Companies start replacing resumes instead of rethinking needs. The best outcomes happen when both sides are willing to reassess.
So, now what?
For candidates, that means asking:
• What do I want next?
• What environment brings out my best work?
• What strengths do I want to use more often?
For hiring leaders, it means asking:
• What problem does this hire need to solve?
• What capabilities matter most now?
• What kind of person will thrive here today, not just historically?
There is no neat formula for what comes next. Sometimes the only real progress is recognizing that the old approach no longer works. That applies to careers, hiring, and most things worth getting right. Once that becomes clear, the conversation changes.